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Friday, January 23, 2009 Y 6:42 AM


This is perhaps a really bad start to a whole new year. A personal burn out issue was not enough.

2 days before CNY, I received the news that my paternal grandmother passed away. She was found dead at home, and her body was already decomposing. How long it was that she had died, I did not know.

What saddens me is that the way she had died. She passed away quietly at home, alone, withouth anyway to seek help, without people knowing. I always weep in my heart when I read in the news about elderly passing away in such a manner. Never did I expect that it occurs to someone that is related to me.

Although I was never closed to her, I felt terribly guilty, knowing that she had to pass away in such loneliness. I felt very depressed knowing that, perhaps I'm also in a very depressed mood and this had only further add on to the sadness.

I felt that I could had at least visited her before she passed away. I was supposed to help her read a letter but I always forgot about it and I haven't help her do it. I felt terribly guilty for not fulfilling my promise.

It's even worser that it's over CNY, so her funeral had to be shortened in mere 2 days. If we had discovered earlier, we wouldn't had to rush it over.

Sigh.....................................





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