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Friday, August 11, 2006 Y 2:26 PM

What would you wish for if you know that your life is coming to an end? Will you fall into the depths of depression or live against death as courageously and fulfilling as you can? Would you hold grudges against those that go against your wish to die? Would you give up life and just try to stage a self fulfilling death through suicide?

Tough as it may sounds but it's really a battle between the dying one and the loved ones. The conflicts experienced by each one of them and yet having no solutions to it. I see that I can fully understand both sides but yet, as the objective of counselling describes, you can only facilitate someone out of a problem and find their own solutions, advice never comes from the counsellor. You can listen, be empathetic, try to bring them through the problems but whether there is a solution, really depends on whether the person wants to find a solution. You can stay there, in that trouble, never getting out of it, if you don't want to move out of it.

Similarly, for death, you can fall into the depths and give up life gradually, and no one will be able to convince you, for you are the one that makes the choice, for you chooses that solution. Is it your fault then? No, it's just human nature, a form of coping strategy, one kind of it to deal with impending doom. Or you can try to fulfill things that you nv done b4, for it is also your choice.

I wish that there was an occupational therapist, or even a counsellor who deals with death, to walk through such issues with the dying and their family for the remaining time. It's a shame that Singapore doesn't have one, for we are missing one big important aspect.

If you think that I'm grieving for the coming loss of someone, then you are half right. I am and I do grieve at times. I am and I do get angry with why people give up life but yet I do understand that when you have nothing more left with what you can do, such bare minimal, it's hard not to fall in darkness. Yet, a big part of me, does not grieve because I fully perceive and understand what is happening. Whether it was you gave up life, whether it was the dilemma of caring personally or professionally.

I'm a healthcare professional and I see why I am made to one. I saw your emotions and I was able to empathise. Thank goodness that I was made to be one, for I saw through everyone, and I understood, and I didn't blame them for what they have done. You did the best in such circumstances, in what I could see. Whoever it is, the dying or the living, I pray that strength comes to you, to guide you through the path of light. I pray that you will forgive yourself. I pray that you will be blessed in afterlife. I pray that you will go through grieve. And I pray that, me, as a healthcare professional, will be fully able to be by all of your side, and try to fulfill whatever support that I could give.

Life is just like a melody, with ups and downs but if you play the melody over and over again, what goes around comes around. The ups will be gone and the downs will come. The downs will go and the ups will come. This is just life, as beautiful as it can be. What's life is you dun have tears to touch your heart, joy to warm your heart and love to fill your heart? Life is just a desire to live, choices to make and death to complete it. Life is just what I am living through now.


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