Saturday, January 14, 2006 Y 8:47 AM
My life was perfect until you appeared.
Then again, it wasn't really perfect...it was just the normal usual life that I lead...until now when you came in and left it.
There's a part of me which has been taken away since u left. The part that I feel confident and happy. '
There's also a part that you given me which nv existed so much in my life before...and that is sadness, loneliness and fear.
Time and time, a small tinge of sadness reside in my heart when you text me or when I talked about you. It isn't as great as in the past where I would drop tears for you. Tears that are worthless and irrelevant to you.
That stage of life is over and gone. I will no longer shed tears for you because I know that, YOU ARE NOT WORTH IT.
Then again, what has been given can never be taken back. I have given my love and it's something that I can nv be returned back. For that love that is nv reciprocated, sadness took over it's place.
Sometimes, I still feel sad that I have loved you before. Mostly, I fear that I will end up as those successful people whom are still single in their 30s or get married in their 30s and have no children.
Despite that I want to do well in my career, I do not and never will want to be that. I'm now 1/4 of a century, single, lonely and real pathetic. Broke, penniless, not looking the best of my life.
Sometimes, I just have this feeling that you were just making use of me. That I was just one of your clients whom like you, so you just take the opportunity to date me. I'm just one of those people available for you to date and ditched.
Until now, you are still trying to make use of me. All those talk about friends and stuff are just plain lies. Fortunately for me, I saw through what was going to happen and ignored you.
It's a pity you don't read this blog because I want to tell you that, if care for a friend to you sums up to be monetary wise, then you are better off without friends. You just make all your friends become your clients and make money out from them.
I really wonder do financial consultants really make good friends then? Well, doesn't matter for me. YOU ARE OUT OF MY LIFE AND PLEASE STAY OUT OF MY LIFE.
We are better off without each other.
Lastly, I have some words to tell you..I dun care whether you read it a not because I already text you that as you are making my life miserable.
You are a f***ing jerk with a f***ing problem, f***ing nv reply my text, f***ing only finds me because you wanna make money, f***ing self centred, f***ing dunno wat is care and friends and in summary, just one f***ing asshole. I pray that you will find the world 'nicest' girlfriend that will make your life 'wonderful'.
You think you are so handsome and great? You think you have better complexion and features than me? If you want a girlfriend just to show, let me tell you, you are hooking up the wrong people.
Just flaunt your money and assets and branded goods around and I bet tons of girls will come running after you. Somehow I'm very thankful that you are making my life miserable because that makes me despise you.
I despise you, your character, your actions, your words and your promises. I wouldn't hate you because to hate you means I have loved you alot. I rather give my love to someone more worthy of me than to someone as ***** as you.
Sometimes, anger can be healthy too. At least, it helps you get over jerks faster.
P.S: In Her Shoes is really nice =)
